Desire_A Romance Collection Read online

  “Oh, yes. We are very close. I mean, she’s my roommate, but she’s the only real friend I’ve made since I came to school and I think that’s because she refuses to go away.”

  “Ah,” Collin insisted, as his eyes widened with what he perceived as understanding. “She told you not to go out with me, didn’t she?”

  “No, actually. She encouraged me to go and to have a good time. She’s the reason that I came out of the dorm last night.”

  “Wow, I’m impressed. That would definitely be a first.”

  “Yeah, she thinks I don’t give happiness a chance, or something like that,” I told him, even though afterward, I wasn’t sure why I had gotten so personal.

  “Well, next time you talk to her, tell her I said thanks,” he answered sincerely, and it was then, that I found him amply more attractive than I did before.

  Perhaps it was the beers or the serious conversation that he hadn’t managed to make about himself, but I saw something truly special in Collin at that moment and I really liked what I saw.

  Instead, he seemed kind, caring and strangely attentive. He seemed normal and levelheaded, not like the rest of the guys that I had met at the school.

  Yet, at the same time, he was unlike anyone I had ever met before; especially not anyone around here or throughout my home town.

  By the time desert arrived, Collin had me thinking that perhaps, I had misjudged him. I was completely unsure about this date, on multiple levels but now, I couldn’t help but realize that I was having a really nice time.

  After dinner, we drove to the movie theater. Strangely enough, the movie theater was about a twenty-minute drive from where we were eating dinner. I had known this when I agreed to go to a movie, though I’d been slightly nervous.

  However, now that we were on our way, I was surprised at how relaxed I was. Normally, I would’ve been completely uncomfortable going such a distance, with a man I didn’t know. Yet, there is a strange connection to Collin and I found that I felt safe with him.

  Perhaps it had something to do with him being the one who helped me that night at the party, or maybe it was just Collin himself and the aura he carried. Either way, I never remembered being so comfortable around a man I had only spent a small amount of time with.

  “I always knew I didn’t want to be anything like my father. He has always been such an asshole. I never wanted to treat anyone the way I have seen him treat people,” Collin insisted as we drove.

  I noticed that he never spoke of his mom, but I figured that might be a topic he didn’t want to discuss, so I didn’t bring it up.

  “My parents aren’t bad people. They’ve never hurt anyone…”

  “Except you,” he hissed and when I stopped to stare at him, his shoulders rose and fell as though he was trying to defend his outburst, “I mean, that’s what it seems like. My father is a dick to me too. I know what it’s like, especially when people who don’t know how he can be sing his praises to you, like he’s some kind of savior.”

  I couldn’t disagree with him. He was right. My parents were mean to me. They were always scheming and being that they were unhelpful in every aspect of ne trying to achieve my goal also didn’t win them any brownie points. So, as much as I would’ve liked to get angry with him and defend my parents, I couldn’t, and it was strange that even he was able to relate to how I felt at times.

  “Being from a small town, everyone loves their parents and thinks of them similarly as you’ve described your father. You’re some kind of ungrateful heretic if you don’t feel similarly.”

  “Yeah, I hear that,” Collin replied, “The only bad part for me, that you’ll probably get to escape is that as much as I don’t want to be like my father, I can’t help it. I’m heading right down the road that leads me to his choices and profession; his life and all the bullshit that comes with it.”

  “I wouldn’t worry too much about that,” I answered, trying to sound supportive. “There’s more than one way to be a successful businessman. You don’t have to be ruthless. I’m sure there are plenty of businessmen who love their life and have gotten things the honest way.”

  His eyes narrowed as his lips curled up into a sincerely amused sneer, “Are you trying to lie to me to make me feel better, or do you really have absolutely no clue how the business world works?”

  I laughed and put my arm around him; a bold move for me.

  He glanced over at my arm, but I ignored it and he didn’t mention it, so I kept it there.

  “Listen, Collin, if I had a dollar for all the things I hope to change about the corporate world that I aim to change, and all the times people have either blatantly, or inadvertently told me I can’t, I’d be richer than your father, but that doesn’t mean shit.”

  Glancing over at me, he blinked with surprise, and his sneer morphed into a humored grin. “I guess you’re right. If you’re confident to do all that, I guess I could find a way to be truly happy and a genuinely good man in the corporate world.”

  “Exactly,” I replied, hoping that what I said to him resonated.

  I couldn’t be sure, though, because shortly after, we pulled into the movie theater.

  After the movie was over, we got back into the car and Collin stared at me with an alluring look in his eye.

  “The night’s still young. I feel like going someplace with you.”

  “Is that right?” I asked gliding my hand up his thigh to give him a positive clue that I understood and was pleased by the insinuation.

  He snickered as he started the car, “I know just the place.”

  The idea of being with him again caused me to feel and instantaneous sense of excitement course through my body. I was shaken by the course of intimacy I felt and by the time we made it to the back road, I had already crossed my other arm over his chest and pulled him closer toward me, nuzzling and pecking at his ear, while my hand traveled up and down underneath his shirt.

  He groaned, and I could already feel his heart beating faster.

  By the time he put the car in park, I was ready for him.

  Collin hastily, ravenously threw the car seat back as far as it would go and took off his seatbelt, as I straddled him.

  Sitting atop of him, I could already feel the pulsing of his member against me. My straight dress rose up, pressing only underwear and jeans between our most sacred spots.

  The feeling of his throbbing caused me to moan and close my eyes, already imagining him penetrating me.

  Without even thinking about it, I slid my underwear down, as Collin undid his pants.

  The idea that we could get caught only made what we were doing more invigorating.

  It didn’t take all that much, just the touch of his strong hands, his salacious kiss, and the knowledge of what we were doing, to moisten myself into being ready to take him.

  As soon as I felt his warmth pressing against me, I eased into him, rubbing myself against him so that the two of us could ease our way into lovemaking, with the limited space we were provided.

  Eventually, he glided against the entrance with ease and lustful need.

  By this time, both of our hearts were pounding, and the windows of the car had fogged up completely.

  Our pulse was also racing as the thudding of our sensual curiosity continued to move us forward.

  After one final thrust against me, Collin readjusted himself correctly, so that he could glide his way into me deeply.

  “Oh…” I moaned, throwing my head back and angling myself to invite him in deeper.

  “Yes…” Collin replied.

  With his hands on either side of my pelvis, he shifted me up and down, in a hastening motion, while I used his shoulders as leverage.

  Our breathing grew rapid and loud as we thrusted toward climaxing; our bodies quaking with need and exhilaration.

  Being that I was still completely new to this progressive, all-consuming feeling of bliss, it seemed to hit me hard, causing me to scream out loud as my body expelled its stress and anxiety,
churning it into sexual ecstasy.

  I expected Collin to tell me to quiet down, but he was also consumed in the moment of climaxing.

  Together, we rocketed out of this world and into a universe that, at least for a few seconds, was all our own.

  Once we were finished, I couldn’t help but think that there might be something serious between us. I certainly didn’t want to be in love, but at this point, I wasn’t entirely sure if I would be able to help it.

  Chapter 8: Collin

  As I pulled away from the college, I was dazed. I had an amazing night. I couldn’t even truly comprehend what had just happened. I was thrilled.

  Yet, I was also terrified.

  I couldn’t even begin to fathom what I could do or what needed to be done. I wasn’t used to having such a strange sensation. I thought that having a date with Flora was going to make everything better. I thought that I would be able to stop thinking about her or possibly even allow myself to find fault with her, so that I wouldn’t continue thinking about her.

  However, after our long conversation and our physical connection, all I wanted was to see her again. It was a strange concept that I didn’t quite understand.

  When I arrived back at my dorm, I was greeted by the ringing of my cellphone. I looked at the time and rolled my eyes. I knew that his probably wasn’t going to be a fun phone call and from the moment I pulled the phone out of my pocket, my fears were confirmed.

  “Dammit,” I muttered before answering the phone. “Hello?”

  “Collin? I heard through the grapevine that you’re no longer living in the house with the guys? Ben’s father said you got in a fight with him over a girl? What the hell is your problem? Are you trying to ruin the relationship I have with the man, or are you just that stupid?” My father’s voice was malicious and cutting.

  “Okay, well, Dad, it’s a little more complicated than that…” I tried, though I knew there was no real point.

  “Why? Because you both fucked her?”

  “Is that what Ben is saying?”

  “What the hell does it matter? The girl isn’t the point, the point is that, I don’t give a shit what’s going on down there in your pants, you are to get back into that house tonight, buy Ben a beer and tell him you were a moron.”

  “I won’t do that, Dad. First of all, this isn’t a love triangle. I fought him because he attacked the girl and I was the one who helped her. I’m not about that.”

  “What the fuck do you care? It’s college. These bitches ask for it all the time and then turn around and cry rape, just because she thinks she can get some money out of him. She’s just a bitch who is playing you, son. She doesn’t love you. She’s just using you for leverage.”

  “Dad, no. She isn’t doing anything for leverage. She’s not pressing charges, or anything…”

  “Oh, so she’s playing the long game? Waiting until Ben actually has money and clout of his own to hit him where it hurts. That’s a smart tactic, but don’t fall for it! She’s just using you.”

  “Oh my God! Dad, do you not see the real issue here? Ben tried to rape her. He attacked her and thankfully, she got away, but he is a monster! I fought him because I was angry, and I wanted him to know that what he did wasn’t right.”

  “So, there’s no proof? Well, then it doesn’t matter what he did, there’s no case. It’s her word against his money and let me tell you, there is so much more of his money than she could ever sweet talk her way out of, so definitely don’t get sucked into that pussy’s black hole of never ending misery.”

  “Dad!” I screamed, unable to understand how he wasn’t getting the severity of what had gone on, “Why don’t you get this. It isn’t a game. He did something terrible and I don’t think this was the first time it happened.”

  “Yeah, son. I get that, but to be blunt, where Ben puts his dick and how he gets it in there isn’t my concern. My concern is securing your future, with connections that will get you places. There’s plenty of time to play the hero when you have found your success, but honestly, by that point, you’ll realize the futility of it. I would focus on making your mark on society in other, more public ways than trying to coax a whore out of her pants. She’s not worth the effort.”

  “Seriously? When did you get to be like this? Don’t you have any care in the world about the girl? About who you associate yourself with?”

  “I think I made my intentions fairly clear. I associate with men of power. Unfortunately, the man of power that is currently helping you have a good education, has a son who’s a complete moron. While I applaud your efforts, I would rather you not be so stupid as to think that your grandeur will be rewarded. I am trying to teach you a lesson, son.” My father’s voice was tight and aggravated, though I wasn’t about to give up.

  I was sure that if I didn’t do what he asked of me, he would be pissed, and the consequences would surely be unfavorable, but I couldn’t live with him anymore, knowing what a dick he was.

  “No, Dad,” I finally replied, unable to agree to such a terrible, character crucifying idea, “I understand you have your own set of morals and I’m okay with respecting that, and Ben’s for that matter, but I can’t accept your unwillingness to understand the severity and Ben’s actions as okay. I am not going to live with someone that does that kind of thing.”

  Even though my father was silent on the other end of the phone, the presence of his disappointment was deafening. It shrouded me in a heavy, overarching fog. To my father, this wasn’t me standing up for what I thought was right. This was just another reason to hate what I had become.

  He and I never saw eye to eye with anything that was driven by morality, or basic human decency. All my father ever cared about was the money that a decision was either going to make or lose. Human collateral and the possibility that people would be hurt, lose savings, or their job in the process meant nothing to him. All he wanted was the results of his actions. The consequences were irrelevant. As long as he could avoid any negative consequences personally, that was what he did.

  My father thought of the corporate world like the animal kingdom and he was the lion; without a human in sight. In most situations, he was on the top of the food chain and considered anyone below him fair game for his own profit. After all, he felt as though he had worked hard enough to get here; he had scraped and scrounged, fiscally slit the throat of anyone who opposed him and guarded himself by keeping his enemies closer than anyone, by pretending that they were friends. In reality, it was more of a who could get the other one first and, in most situations, my father was the one who was left standing…and history is never written by the losers, so he finagled the story to make himself look good, however he could. Thus, he could continue this practice repeatedly, without anyone being any the wiser.

  “Alright,” my father finally insisted, “I suppose I can’t stop you. You are going to do what you will, and I will try my best to keep you in school, but mark my words, boy, if this goes south, I will severe ties from you with a haste you can’t even imagine. You will not be anything more than a ghost of my past; an anomaly, that shares my name. You will not bring me down. I did this for you, to help you and this is the way you repay me? Fine.”

  With that, the line went dead. I pulled the phone away from my ear and stared at it for a long time, just thinking about what my father had said.

  Even though his threat to disown me should’ve bothered me, because that would’ve effectively left me out on the street; it was more the anger he showed at what I thought was a good deed, that bothered me more than anything.

  Of course, I hadn’t tried to be brave, or noble, or…heroic. I wasn’t even sure if what I did actually counted as any of those things, but he seemed to think I had done it, specifically to spite him.

  That didn’t make sense to me, considering he had nothing to do with it, or at least, he shouldn’t have had anything to do with it. I was waiting for the call, but somehow, even though I knew the truth, I expected it to go differently.
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  I guess, I hoped it would go differently.

  Since it hadn’t, though, I figured I couldn’t stay in the car all night, so I might as well go up to my dorm.

  “Hey, dude! How was the date?” Gavin asked, in his normal spot; sitting on his bed, staring at the television at the foot of it.

  “The date was awesome,” I answered, still feeling extremely out of sorts from the conversation I’d had with my father.

  “What? Did her vag have teeth, or something?” He laughed, “What’s wrong?”

  “No, it didn’t have anything to do with my date, or Flora at all,” I answered, motioning in a manner that told him I wasn’t in the mood to joke around.

  “Okay, then, what the hell?” He replied, now turning toward me as I sat on my bed, across from his.

  “I heard from my dad tonight,” I answered, without looking at him.

  “Oh, shit. What a cock-block that is,” he insisted.

  “No, not while I was with her. When I got back to the dorm.”

  “Oh, well, at least you got some before getting your ass handed to you,” his shoulders rose and fell, trying to be lighthearted, but realizing there was nothing he could do to make me take that bait. “Um…I’m sorry. I’m guessing it didn’t go well?”

  “No,” I responded dryly, before giving him a rundown of exactly how my father had reacted.

  “Well, what did you expect?” Gavin demanded when I as finished and looked to him for a reaction. “I mean, it’s not like your father has ever been one for morality, honor, or avoiding taking what he wants, simply because he wants it…” Gavin shrugged, “My old man is the same way. You know, they’re never going to change, so why do you even try?”

  “I knew he was an asshole, but I didn’t think he was that bad,” I answered honestly, “I mean, he didn’t even care that his friend’s son is going around campus, practically raping girls. Isn’t that weird to you?”

  “Of course, it’s weird, but we’re normal. We’re not our fathers. If I told my old man what happened, he’d probably congratulate Ben on being assertive…and then try to ream me out because I’m not more like him…Even though I get more women…Go figure.”